after 39 weeks of pregnancy bliss, i have to admit i didn't see this coming: i am OVER being pregnant. don't get me wrong, i still feel pretty good- i've only gained 25 pounds, my face has stopped breaking out, i'm not swollen, and i'm still sleeping great. but let's be honest, everyone is pregnant for a reason and that's a baby at the end of this journey. and the fact is, i'm ready to meet her.
i've had a pretty easy time of this pregnancy thing. but lately i've been hormonal and crabby beyond recognition. luckily, no one really gets to see this because my hubby is at work all day and i've spent the past two weeks finishing up random errands before my child decides to greet me. EVERYTHING is driving me crazy- poor drivers, the obnoxious dogs downstairs who bark at me and every other person who walks by, other people having their babies before me, dealing with my insurance about getting a breast pump (STILL), and incessant phone calls and texts from people asking me how i'm feeling and if there's a baby yet (yeah, like i'm not going to tell you if the baby came!). i'm stressed out with family coming in to town 1 day after my due date, especially when i told them not to come so early, and the thought of having too many people cramping my style post-birth.
i'm tired of people telling me that i'm so small (!), that i must be carrying a boy, or that i don't look pregnant from the back. people- i'm right on track for gestational age, will probably have a 7lb baby and trust me- she's a girl. as for looking pregnant from the back, what does that even mean?
i'm frustrated with my own body for not giving me any indication when this baby is coming. i've been dilated a 1cm for over a month and pretty much nothing else. i have no braxton hicks or regular contractions, and the baby hasn't dropped. i know that labor can start whenever, but i'm starting to feel like i'll be pregnant FOREVER.
i know, dramatic. but anyone who has stood where i do now can identify with how i'm feeling. with 5 days until my due date, i'm just plain ready to add the missing piece of this 9 month long puzzle. i've run out of errands to do and baby supplies to buy because frankly, all i need is this baby! please God, don't let me have a March baby! the thought of going in to next month might very well kill me.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Oh I've been there...twice! I think the last couple of weeks are the hardest because of the anticipation, anxiety and everything else going on with your hormones! The BEST thing I did in my last two weeks of pregnancy was go for multiple LONG walks every day. I turned them into prayer walks and had a long list of prayer requests that I brought before God about labor and delivery, parenting, etc. It was so exciting to see God answer each and every one of those requests as labor progressed. Plus, all the walking did my body good, and helped get things going. You WILL have this baby; it just might take longer than you wanted, and before you know it, the frustration you're feeling now will seem like a dream. I'm praying for you, friend! Praying that God will bring you peace and rest. That you enjoy this sweet time ALONE! That He would give you the strength and endurance you will need to get that girl out. That your L&D team would be the best of the best. You've got this!
ReplyDelete