Yep, there's a baby in there.

You know when you think of the future and can't imagine what it would be like? Or maybe you do imagine and it's too hard to wrap your head around so you just stop thinking about it? Like when you think of Heaven and eternity, and what will i do all the time, and will i get bored, and will Jesus kinda scare me with His majesty, and will loved ones know who i am, ok i'll just stop thinking about this now?

that was me. or rather, it IS me. the future was always just that- not yet come. i'll deal with it then, yadda yadda. i wasn't really worried, it just didn't really have anything to do with what i was doing RIGHT NOW. plus, i worry enough as it is, and didn't Jesus say not to worry about tomorrow because today has enough problems as it is?

but then i hit my 30's (stereotypical, right?) and saw my life flash before my eyes in half the time it took to get here. the hubs and i have lived a blessed life and done whatever we've wanted. we've held good jobs, we have good friends, we are both sick of this stinking apartment we've been in for the past seven years. there are changes on the horizon, like will we buy a house or what job will Dave have next, but when aren't there? and let's be honest, we ain't getting any younger.

so while i don't particularly love change, certain things in life have expiration dates and sometimes you've gots to make up your mind sooner than later.

so we got a little crazy and let loose and are now trying to wrap our minds around THIS:

yep my friends, there's a baby. in my uterus. we all know how it got there so i won't bore (or the opposite) you with the details except to say that i wasn't QUITE expecting it to be there so soon.

i always thought that since i haven't pined over the thought of being a mother my entire life like so many people i know, that God would take his sweet time in gifting us with such a huge responsibility.  in fact, i kind of thought i deserved it after being so outspoken about not wanting children for so long.  but i guess He thought we were up to the challenge, and here we are, expanding our family come February 2013!

of course i in no way feel ready for this. who really does? i've spent most mornings waking up stating the ever so obvious to myself: "i'm pregnant." it feels scary just saying. "pregnant" is what other people say. and now me. so here goes!